Rambling about the Journey.

I'm putting down roots after moving 700 miles
from what was familiar and comfortable. Over the next few months I'll be blogging about
the journey toward establishing myself in a new community.

Rachael Leaves a Fingerprint

Last year, a friend from work named Rachael passed away. She was a young, beautiful woman.

I remember her interviewing with my VP and SVP. I remember the self doubt on her face, how she clutched her portfolio closely--her big doll-like eyes wide. I noticed that she could turn on a big smile full of light. I remember her resume and the equivalent of a sell sheet for herself--a smart strategy for someone interviewing for a business development role.

Once she was hired, I remember how she and I would banter about the correct spelling of "Rachel/Rachael." We always disagreed.

 My memories of Rachael are good evidence of this quote:

People May Not Remember Exactly What You Did or Said but They Will Always Remember How You Made Them Feel

Rachael was still in her mid-20s and she respected my experience and knowledge. When talking to her, I felt like a mentor, like I had something of value to offer her--my experience, wisdom, and knowledge. She noticed and commented on the little things that came naturally to me after so many years in health care business and in the corporate world. She reminded me of how far I had come and how I had something to offer those on the path behind me.

Even though the time that we worked together was short, our interactions relatively few--I still think about her a lot. Not only because of how she made me feel, but because her fingerprint remains.

She's in my phone.

She's still linked to me on LinkedIn.

She's still one of the options to select when I send an email and start typing "Rac...."

Until this week, she was in my Microsoft Communicator.

I have emails from her.

Rachael's fingerprint remains.

Bubbling and Gurgling

Over the past year I have written many posts in my head for this blog. Posts about appalling things I've witnessed and experienced in corporate America, posts about our kids and the cool things they are doing, posts about adjusting to life in a new community, posts about marriage, birthday posts, an anniversary post or two. They've stayed right where they were written--in my head.

The posts are starting to gurgle, bubble, add pressure--they have to get out. So I'm writing this post as a commitment, mostly to myself, to kick start the blogging. I have some really neat things to share and it's time to put them out there.

I'm looking forward to sharing more of my life and my thoughts.

Reviewing the Bucket List of 2010

One of the great things about blogging is that I write what I'm thinking, I assume other people read it, and those words stick. They are out there in the universe, someone may hold me accountable for those words, and I am more likely to remember those thoughts.

I frequently go back to the words I wrote a year ago -- My Bucket List for 2010. As a refresher:

My goal for 2010 is to experience life and enjoy myself. Here's my list of what I'd like to do in 2010.

1. Sit on the beach and enjoy the sunshine.
2. Go camping for at least a week this summer.
3. Travel to a place I haven't been to with my family.
4. Read a book or two for fun.
5. Buy a bicycle and start a new habit.
6. Get closer to being caught up on my scrapbooking.
7. Make a new friend and strengthen existing relationships

I think that's a pretty full list for a year. I'm looking forward to reporting progress!

 I never reported progress, but I thought about the first item on my bucket list a lot. "Sit on the beach and enjoy the sunshine."

When I made that list, I was thinking of the Illinois State Beach, which was less than 10 miles away from my home. I was thinking of those days that I stopped working at 5 p.m., came down the steps, fed the kids a little something, and took off for the beach. I only did it a few times, but it was really fun. After scrambling through the sand, I'd lay in the sand and feel the exhaustion and stress be pulled from my body. Ultimate relaxation.



I was thinking that I would try to do that more.

Who knew that instead, I would move 700 miles away and get to enjoy an Atlantic Ocean beach for the first time. (see post: Play in the Waves or Seek the Easy Path)


I did not realize that I would live a mile away from a community beach on a river (but brackish water because it mixes with the salt of the Chesapeake Bay). I did not know that I was going to be able to come home from work, walk four blocks, and sit on a green bench and soak up the view of the water.


I made that bucket list and I accomplished several of items on the list in ways I did not expect:

1. Sit on the beach and enjoy the sunshine: Near our new home in Maryland and in Delaware
2. Go camping for at least a week this summer: We camped for two weeks while trying to find a place to live. We were done with camping after that.
3. Travel to a place I haven't been to with my family: Moved to Maryland. While I had driven through when I was 20, it wasn't memorable.
7. Make a new friend and strengthen existing relationships: I was forced to make new friends. During the transition, Mark and I became the best of friends and learned that we could really rely on each other. For awhile, we only had each other. My friends in Illinois became a lifeline as I reached out by phone and Facebook.

I'm glad I wrote that bucket list. It's interesting to see how it worked out and how it didn't. I accomplished four out of seven goals, all four in ways I would have never anticipated.

Book Review: The Five Dysfunctions of a Team

A friend of mine is a good listener. She understands the challenges of navigating the complex relationships in the workplace. If there's an answer to a problem, she'll find it. Recently, she came to the East Coast for a work event, we met for dinner, and she gave me a book. I had to wait a week to read it, but I devoured it in a weekend (maybe it was just a Saturday afternoon, if I remember correctly).

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, a Leadership Fable by Patrick Lencioni was fun to read, insightful, and thought provoking. Told as a story, the characters come alive and exhibit common behaviors in the workplace. I liked that the CEO character was a woman who was not a shark nor a bitch, but down-to-earth, smart, respectable, and strong. Personally, I could relate to her background as a teacher since teaching is my natural gift.



Throughout the story, the author illustrates the five dysfunctions and how they can be overcome. The five dysfunctions of a team are:
1.  Absence of Trust
2. Fear of Conflict
3. Lack of Commitment
4. Avoidance of Accountability
5. Inattention to Results

My takeaways from the book are:
  • There needs to be a foundation of trust. If something or someone threatens that trust, it should be addressed. I see that a team needs to have channels for communication and the environment for voicing concerns (which is how trust and conflict intersect positively).
  • Conflict, disagreement is a positive. Without it, a bad idea may be implemented, which hurts the team.
  • The inattention to results referenced the importance of a team goal and vision, which should be put first in front of individual ego. I remember a situation in my team where someone put their ego first and it ended up hurting the team. I will speak up if such a situation happens again (since I now know that conflict is OK).
  • It's important to consentiously bring together a team for a purpose, to be strategic about leading and guiding, to be attentive to the team's cohesiveness and interpolitics.
The story was entertaining and used great examples of how each dysfunction shows up in the workplace, as well as ways that the dysfunction can be reversed.

I noticed a few pieces were missing. No character was described as being non-white. Maybe as a white reader, I assumed all the characters were white when in fact the characters trascended race and culture. But I doubt it. Also, the common behaviors I didn't see included were undermining each other and trash-talking, which seems to happen a lot in the workplace. I also found it unbelieveable that the former CEO let his position be taken by a woman and he took a lower position without any backstabbing and drama.

I found  it difficult to read the last 40 pages that weren't part of the story, but typical non-fiction prose. After enjoying a story, it was difficult to get into reading the instructions on how to apply the principles illustrated into the story. Since I still don't have a deep understanding of how the author recommends overcoming the dysfunctions, I should probably re-read those pages and consider reading his other book about overcoming the dysfunctions of a team.

This book has wide applications. In any situation when two or more people need to work together to accomplish a goal, they can learn from The Five Dysfunctions of a Team. I can see it helping a group of volunteers, PTA, small business, executive team, sports team. I would recommend the book to anyone looking to understand how to create an effective team to achieve a goal.

Click Over and Say Hi to a New Blogger

Blogging has been an online journaling tool for me. It's a great way to put my opinions, thoughts, and feelings out there. It helps me refine my reactions to life. I am able to get the swirling thoughts out. I love the interaction with those who comment.

It's exciting when someone new starts blogging and my sister Melissa is just recently joined the ranks of we bloggers.

Her designs recently went to print on fabric, making a dream come true! I'll be blogging more as I use her fabric to create some pretty quilts and apparel.

Get to know Melissa and leave a comment: http://www.melissamariecollins.blogspot.com/. She has a vibrant personality and that's evident on her blog and in her art.